Seeing how there is no easy way to delete your account, I gave up trying to turn every entry over the past year and a half into a private one.

I'm done with Xanga. It's been fun while it lasted. Maybe I'll start a new xanga someday... maybe not. But it's definitely time for this one to be retired. I've drifted away from some friends who may have known me as someone different than who I currently am. That's just how life goes. No excuses, no apologies.

"If you realize that friends change, you don't have to change friends."

To my subscribers: You guys are wonderful. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my site. Good luck on weddings, babies, sorority life, flash animations, real world, college, the girl in paris, being a mother, school, and everything else. I'll still read your sites, and check back on this entry if you want to get in touch with me. Otherwise, email me at hren@umich.edu

Good bye.

Sunday night: He comes over drunk because one of his brothers got into med school and brought beer to chapter.

Tonight: He comes over drunk because he had an election day party.

The school week lasts from Sunday night till Thursday night for me. I admit, I usually drink on Thursday-Saturday. On the nights I don't drink, 50% of the time he comes over drunk.

Should I be bothered by this? I mean, he does live in a fraternity... but jesus christ... god, at least invite me... That's not even the issue. On the nights he's not drunk, he's high, admitedly so am I. However, I have nights off. I mean, I think that *I* drink and smoke too much and I don't do it as much as he does.

So many braincells... killed.

I'm concerned. But don't want to be overbearing. I don't know what to think.

[The story behind your user name]: It was my screenname when I was 13... and it just sorta stuck
[How old?]: 18, 19 on friday!
[Where do you live?]: Ann Arbor, Michigan.
[4 words that sum you up]: outgoing, friendly, indecisive, open-minded

DESCRIBE YOUR...

[Wallet]: A black fossil wallet with a change thing attached to it.[Toothbrush]: Oral-B, turquoise and white
[Jewelry worn daily]: My rings- the one yao made for my 14th birthday, the one jeff gave me for our 6 months, one i made junior year, and a puzzle ring i got from new zealand. Also a necklace[Pillow cover]: cream colored with crocheted lace things
[Blanket]: down comforter inside a cream colored duvet
[Coffee cup]: the one starbucks gives me when i order coffee
[Sunglasses]: I actually don't have any
[Underwear]: either string bikinis or thongs... today I'm wearing a gray victoria's secret string bikini
[Shoes]: I have many... today I wore my black steve maddens that look orthopedic.
[Handbag]: it varies, but usually a black shoulder purse
[Favorite top]: I would say... my yellow frilly tube top- always a party favorite.
[Favorite pants]: I don't have a pair, hence I need to buy new ones. I really want to get a pair of Seven jeans... even though they cost an arm and a leg
[Cologne/Perfume]: Green tea or DKNY
[CD in stereo right now]: Nothing
[Tattoos]: blue star with a purple swirl in it and another red star behind it on my belly, and three yellow stars connected by blue swirly things on the side of my right boob.
[Piercings]: 2 in each ear, bellybutton
[What you are wearing now]:  my skyblue Gap velour pants, a yellow AE thermal and Jeff's Michigan sweatshirt he gave me cuz it shrunk.
[Hair]: I need to get it cut and dyed.
[Makeup]: Depends on the occassion, usually black or blue eyeliner and silver shadow

WHO or WHAT (was/is/are) -

[In my mouth]: the last thing I ate was boston market chicken
[head]: I have to study econ...
[After this]: Reading my econ book
[Talking to]: nobody.
[Eating:]: was eating chicken
[Person you wish you could see right now]: uh... Jeff? I'll see him in a few hours.
[Is next to you]: nobody, Jess is next door
[Some of your favorite movies]: Amelie, the wedding singer, the shawshank redemption
[Favorite TV show]: I don't really watch TV... but I'm a big fan of Spongebob Squarepants!
[Something that you are deathly afraid of?]: Growing up and marrying someone I don't love and doing a job I don't like and existing from one day to the next without anything to look forward to.
Do you like candles: yes
Can you eat with chopsticks: I'm asian. What do you think?
[What are some of your favorite pig out foods?]: Sushi, pringles, sunchips, ice cream
What's something that you wish people would understand?]: The way I think.

I am so fucking bored.

BORED

I want to drive, just get in my car and drive away... doesn't matter where. Doesn't matter...

Nothing is wrong. Nothing is right. I am sick of everything. everyone. Life. No reason. No, I'm not PMSy. Just tired... of life.

I am: Sick of parties. Sick of drinking. Sick of socializing. Sick of classes. Sick of work. Sick of this stupid campus. Sick of Ann Arbor. Sick of America. Sick of sex. Sick of eating. Sick of food. Sick of pretending like I care. Sick of talking to people I don't want to. Sick of living with people I don't like. Sick of winter and it hasn't even started yet. Sick of my headache. Sick of making flashcards. Sick of my playlist. Sick of movies. Sick of friends. Sick of boyfriend. Sick of relationships in general. Sick of myself.

I lack: ambition. energy. strength. stamina. motivation.

I'm just so.... BLAH!!!

Lesson of the day:

Ethiopian cuisine is not very good. The Blue Nile in A2 is overrated.